Mothers & Daughters

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So many different stories in the life of a teen girl – where to begin? Read about what is happening with other girls lives here.

Mothers & Daughters

By: Mareesa Miles

“MOMMMM!”         

“Ugggh! You just don’t understand!”

“No. I understand perfectly. You still aren’t going!” The shouts followed by stomping feet or slammed doors. Tears falling down cheeks and a struggle to breath; the epic battles of mother and daughter when the things you want seem so incredibly simple. It happened with my mother and I. Day after day we drew our swords and faced one another for battle. Mothers drive daughters crazy. Sometimes, it seems that all they do is pretend to know something they don’t, to pry into our business and try to act cool. But don’t forget, daughters drive mother’s crazy at times, too.

It isn’t easy being a daughter and as we get older it seems to get harder. But it isn’t any easier to be a mother. The positions are different, but the amount of struggle is the same. Our mothers want to protect us from the suffering they themselves had to deal with. They want us to be outgoing if they were shy, to be studious even when they never were. Yet, all they really want is to raise children that they could be proud of; a happy healthy child. The maternal instinct makes them want nothing less than to keep their children safe, to keep them alive at least until their own passing day.

Despite their best intentions, mothers are not perfect; they make mistakes as much as we do. Of course they aren’t going to always tell us about those mistakes, and if they do they might quote the old saying, “do what I say and not as I do.”

Those of us lucky enough to have mothers help us navigate our paths through life should appreciate what a spectacular gift the love of a mother actually is. They deserve our love as much as we deserve theirs. So on those days when things get rough, when the tears start falling and the tempers flare, take a moment to breathe and understand why your mother is saying what she is saying. Maybe when you reach a point of calmness you can come to a compromise. If possible find out why your mother has made her decision, maybe she doesn’t have all the information. If she holds to her declaration, don’t whine and cry, but take it like an adult, show her that you aren’t a child and that you can truly be trusted.

Another tactic that I have found handy when talking to my mother is letter writing. Sometimes it is easier to say exactly what you mean when it is put on paper rather than free falling from the mouth. It's always time to self-reflect, to make sure what you say is really what you mean. Like any communication, that between a mother and a daughter can be confusing, it can need navigation on both sides. Building a relationship between mother and daughter isn’t easy. However, it is incredibly rewarding and worth ever minute of the challenges. So next time you want to scream out at your mom for telling you couldn’t attend a party:

 

1.      Breathe and try to put yourself in her shoes.

2.      Try to find a way to compromise in an adult fashion

3.      Ask yourself if what you want is really worth a battle?

 

 

Comments

Question?

There is only one story why? Seem like more mother's and daughter's would love writting about life experience growing up together. :-)

My Mom.

My mom's awesome, but I don't think she's that cool or even trying to be cool. Like she tends to yell at me and pressure perfection of me, I do try my best. Mom hates it when I'm demanding towards her about things I want/need. Mom just calls this being a spoiled brat, like Veruca Salt from one of my favorite books, Charlie and The Chocolate Factory (I liked it since I was six) Point is I kept telling her Veruca's not real, and that I'm not spoiled and she doesn't want to give me everything (sometimes both her and dad can be very cheap with how they spend money, and won't even give me an allowance)

Plus, I know what sorta mother I'd be like to my teen/tween girl or boy. Super cool, lets them hang out with anybody they like (like no pushing away their friends because they're a "bad influence") I also would let my TWEEN (age 9-13) girl watch the Clique, Mean Girls, and Mean Girls 2, unlike when I was that age, and even at 14 and 15, I wasn't allowed to see them. Plus, Mom's deciding if I could see the DUFF with Bella Thorne starring in it, and possibly I'd get it for Christmas or my 17th birthday. Oh, plus as a super cool mom, comes great night responsibility, though, like when they are still children (baby-8) and not tweens (age 9-13) or teens (14-19) I'd never let the younger kids do what they want; in fact I'd be super overprotective of them, looking up CommonSense Media for EVERYTHING my little ones wanted to see, play or do. If it had nothing inappropriate at all (like G-rated) I'd let them see movies, TV shows, play video games, and listen to music. If not, the only show that's G-rated is Sesame Street, Arthur, Phineas and Ferb or Fairly Odd Parents, and especially the Suite Life (Zack and Cody and On Deck) Probably though, in like, 2031, the shows I like and liked when I was younger wouldn't be on anymore (off the air) Except for Arthur, which would possibly be centuries in the future will still be on and not canceled. Probably cause the creator of the show, Mark Brown, has kids who will soon have kids, and the next thousands of Brown families will be creating the whole show episodes.