Taylor Swift: Possible Feminist? by Julie Zeilinger (theFBomb)

I love Taylor Swift. According to iTunes, I have listened to her latest CD, Speak Now, 31 times. I have bought every magazine that featured her on the cover in the past two months and read each interview multiple times. I stalk her Twitter account. Basically, I have become a fangirl stereotype.

I know. You’re probably thinking, “Wow, another teenage girl who likes Taylor Swift. How out of the ordinary considering that she is ranked #12 on Forbes’ Powerful Celebrity List and seems to win something at every award show she attends, whether she was nominated or not.” But this has been an interesting experience for me because I have never really looked up to celebrities.

When virtually all of my friends went through a fanatic phase for a certain emo pop punk band Sophomore year (literally all of our conversations were dominated about musings of their inner thoughts, likes, dislikes, childhood dreams, whether they preferred Unicorns or Narwhals etc.) I rolled my eyes and ambivalently dealt with it. As my friend literally writhed in her seat next to me while watching Taylor Lautner take off his shirt in New Moon and immediately began to plan their wedding, I internally struggled with the messages about unhealthy relationships the movies was sending.

But for Taylor Swift, I have become a stereotype. And normally, I’d feel unsettled by such a fact. But not this time. Why? Because Taylor Swift is feminist (even if she doesn’t identify as a feminist…that I know of). I know there has been debate about this, especially here on the fbomb, but let me explain.

I think my personal journey with Taylor started when my boyfriend and I broke up (of course it did). My best friend was also dealing with a break up, and to her credit, she found T-Swizzle first. During one of our marathon bitch sessions about how the opposite sex and people in general really do suck, she mentioned how she had bought the Deluxe version of Speak Now and had it on repeat. She said that while nobody else really understood, Taylor did. I was skeptical, but the next time I was at Starbucks trying to convince the barista to fill my Speedway 64-ouncer with coffee (FOR THE RECORD I offered to pay extra but they weren’t having it), I noticed Speak Now at the register, and just as Starbucks assumed I would, I saw the swirly purple of her pretty dress on the cover and impulse purchased it.

Thus began the Taylor Swift immersion. Dear John outlined everything I wanted to say to my ex-boyfriend. Better Than Revenge perfectly summed up what I wanted to say to my former friend who had written the love letter to my boyfriend that spurred out break up, as did Mean (um, I’m pretty sure I actually shook the house with the loud volume I mustered to spew the line, “All you are is mean, and a liar, and pathetic, and alone in life and mean.”). And HELLO The Story of Us perfectly summed up the first time I had to see both of those jerks again at school (*general note* don’t date people that go to the same school as you. Especially when your school only has 400 people and like 5 square feet).

Even when my friends were sick of listening to me, I could sing along to Taylor Swift – it was as good as therapy. When I felt guilty about how petty my emotions seemed, when I wanted more than anything to just forget and move on and not spend another minute thinking about things that didn’t really deserve my time, her music reflected that. And how did I know that I had officially moved on? When I played Speak Now from start to finish and realized I was jamming just because it was good music, not because I had a bevy of pent up emotions.

But what about her being feminist? Well I haven’t forgotten that. The music industry in our society has gotten to the point where listening to the radio is really not so much better than flipping through a fashion magazine. Both bombard us with messages about how to look and act, and those messages aren’t necessarily the healthiest. If it’s not the Pussycat Dolls (I mean, really, Pussy. Cat. Dolls. Enough said.) telling us to try to be hotter than other girls to compete for guys, it’s some rapper telling us to shake our asses or lick their lollipop. Or, in the less detrimental realm, songs that try to capture real experiences are so base and are more reflective of a half-hour situation comedy than real life.

Now, Taylor may have written a few songs that err on the ridiculously romantic side. And I get that those generally employ gender stereotypes, heteronormativity and set us up for disappointment in our relationships. But REALLY how many of us can say we haven’t had similar fantasies? Also, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with having high standards in our romantic lives, even if a prince riding in on his steed may be a little too high. And as long as we supplement those love stories with songs that remind us that we were all naïve freshmen once, everybody makes mistakes, and that it’s okay that that douchebag hurt you, he doesn’t deserve you anyway- which Swift also supplies us with – well, then, we’re just listening to an accurate description of the range of emotions we experience in our lives. I just don’t see her being a hopeless romantic dreamer as hugely detrimental to the feminist cause when she backs it up with songs that clearly show the converse to those fantasies, and plenty of songs that are straight up empowering.

Taylor Swift tells the truth. She is able to sum up the teenage experience in a way that completely expresses every emotion I’ve felt in the past 4 years in 4 minutes increments. She honestly depicts what teens feel from the most embarrassing regrets of our lives to the ultimate high points, and makes us feel like feeling all of those things are good. There’s no shame. There’s no sense of not living up to some fucked up societal standard. She’s just plain honest and wants to connect with her audience – rather than be an unattainable ideal — and that comes across. She inspires connections; not just between her and her fans, but amongst fans — when we listen to her lyrics and think to ourselves It’s like she understands my life we realize that that is the same thing the rest of her fans are thinking, and we’re able to connect with each other. If that’s not sisterhood, then I don’t know what is. Also, her willingness to be a real girl amongst a sea of over-produced, image-controlled feminine ideals posing as “artists” is something that as a feminist I can seriously appreciate. She is very aware of her position as a role model to young women, and takes great care to set a good example.

Maybe Taylor Swift’s songs don’t represent a perfect feminist ideal. But we don’t live in an ideal world. And in my opinion she represents the epitome of a poised, gracious, philanthropic role model in the reality that we’ve got. And I sure as hell appreciate her for it.

So, Taylor Swift. Rock on. And learn more about feminism. I think you’d like it.

Check out TheFBomb

And buy Taylor Swifts latest album!

Why I Respect Taylor Swift by by Julie Zeilinger (the FBomb)

“I wanted this since the time I was a little girl. I’ve always just wished that maybe someday people would care about the words that I wrote. I’m so lucky that my songs are basically my diary put to music. I’m so lucky that I get to write my own music and write my own stories, so every single time I look down in the audience and I see somebody singing the words back to me, it makes it all worth it.” 

-Taylor Swift to the Associated Press

She is totally the one of these celebuteens that I believe. I believe she’s actually talented and I believe she actually means those words. Support the Swift!

Girl Zone loves Taylor Swift too - see more articles at TheFBomb

Another Teen Show Rant...

By Julie Zeilinger - F-Bomb

Watching T.V. shows like Gossip Girl, 90210 and even Skins (Britain’s take on the teen melodrama) is my favorite form of escapism during the school year. As a teenage feminist, watching these shows can be frustrating. But I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that I actually loved the exaggerated depiction of what teens’ lives are like.

But I enjoy these shows despite my unquestionable knowledge that the display before me was completely unrealistic. In fact, that is why I like them. Over-exaggeration can be fun. But I hope that it’s general knowledge that "teen shows"- the ones that are supposed to relate most closely to our lives- the ones full of drinking and drug use and sex - the ones that don't spare the nitty gritty- these shows aren't actually reality. I enjoy watching theses shows through the lens of a completely unreal, fantasy teen world, but I worry that little girls who live far from the big cities where these shows take place, who have never been further than a few hours from their house, won’t see it that way.

The fact is T.V. networks sell us the images we think are cool by saying that they are our lives - that way we feel cool consuming their product - sex, drugs and lies. And here's how they do it:

No Parents

These kids are sophomores/juniors in high school and apparently they're all emancipated minors living lavish life styles. Almost all 16-year-olds have some type of guardian. This is an especially salient point of Gossip Girls. In this show, parents are there merely to serve as an additional plot line, not as the anchors of reality, or actual parents. The most parenting I saw from Lily, the teen character of Serena’s mother on Gossip Girls, was when she had her daughter arrested. And then Blair and Serena, two teens, decide to go to a swanky bar on a weeknight- no carding, of course, they're the elite after all. They have inconsequential sleepovers at their boyfriends' houses. No big deal.

Drinking, Smoking, Sexing OH MY!

These "teens" (by which I mean actors in their twenties) drink like fish, further elevating their chance of liver damage later in life every episode, smoke cigarettes and pot, and are promiscuous. Yes, it is true that teens actually do drink, smoke and have sex. But it's not all of us. It's not even most of us. And it's rarely at the alcoholic and addictive points displayed in these shows. Some of us are responsible and conscious of our health.

Drama, Drama, Drama

With story lines revolving around teen pregnancy and rehab I can’t help but wonder how we’re supposed to take any of it seriously. There's nothing wrong with drama in what are really just glorified soap operas, but that's the point. These shows tout themselves as representing reality, despite the fact that most teens do not live each day like a party subsidized by their trust fund.

Because, let's all face it, our lives on average wouldn’t really make the most interesting T.V. show. Which, as it turns out, is actually fine. I hear all these teens complaining about how boring their lives are, because whether consciously or not they're comparing their lives to the lives depicted in Gossip Girl and 90210, which just promote irresponsible promiscuity, drug use and other stupid moves. We watch these shows and we roll our eyes because most of us realize that life isn't like that. But then we go and strive to match it anyway.

Considering that we all know better and it still has such a strong effect on us, I'm seriously worried about those girls in rural areas, the 6^th graders watching, and even the parents who now think that this is what we're like. The bottom line? I’m still waiting for a T.V. show that actually represents my life as a smart, well-rounded young woman.

How Are Teenage Girls Supposed to Identify as Feminists With These Role Models?

By Julie Zeilinger - F-Bomb

 She’s staring at me like I’ve just insinuated she embodies the anti-Christ. “A feminist? No, I’m not a feminist. Oh my God.” Despite the fact that this classmate of mine just spent ten minutes ranting about how a woman has the right to choose and thinks anybody who disagrees is archaic, she is equally appalled at the thought of labeling herself as a feminist. Am I frustrated? Yes. But as a teenage feminist, I’m used to it.

 Teenage feminists are a mighty minority. You may find us in the malls, mingling amongst girls who carry bags plastered with the image of a naked torso and the word “Abercrombie.” We’re even at football games, willingly crushed between excited pubescent bodies. Maybe we’re the girls in the hoodies rolling our eyes as the cheerleaders jump around, but we are there. The fact is: we’re not always the hairy-legged girls with makeup-less faces scowling through the daily grind of the high school experience, clutching a battered copy of The Second Sex. Sometimes we are. But we’re not always that easy to spot.

 Why? That image is a stereotype most feminists, let alone teenagers, don’t fit. We can be the girl at the game, the girl shaking her ass at homecoming, or even the “girl next door.” So, why can’t you recognize us? Most teenage feminists don’t even know that they are teenage feminists. How could you?

 How are we supposed to identify as feminists when most of us don’t even know what a feminist looks like? Role models are important. They help us figure out who we are as we sit in a cafeteria full of people who are defined by a single word. Prep. Jock. My favorite: Slut. Role models help us figure out what we want to be rather than what everybody else has labeled us.

But who are our role models? Most teenage girls don’t know who Gloria Steinem is, or they believe that Hillary Clinton is a whiny bitch, because that’s how the media portrays her. It’s sad but true. If these women are even on our radar at all, they’ve probably already been made unpopular by the media. And nobody wants to be unpopular at sixteen. We fear the hatred of others like our parents fear taxes.

But who is on our radar? Singers like Lady Gaga? Lady I-Recognize-The-Blatant-Sexism-In-The-Music-Industry-But-I-Love-Men-So-I’m-Not-A-Feminist-Gaga? Even more frustrating are the women who might be feminists, who make feminist statements in their music or interviews, but who have never confirmed this.

 My solution is to be my own role model. Of course I draw from the masters: Gloria Steinem, Betty Freidan, Jessica Valenti, Courtney Martin. But it’s come to the point where the only reliable person I can depend on is myself, which is a feminist idea in and of itself. Of course this is easier said than done. The essential problem is that most girls need role models because they can’t come up with all the answers on their own. Plus, girls my age are trained so thoroughly to hate themselves that sadly, it’s probably harder for them to be their own role models than to find one in the vast, global populace.

 It ends here. Our society’s obsession with fame is more than creepy or sad. It’s detrimental. We are looking up to people whose greatest accomplishments include grinding on stage in glorified lingerie and flashing the paparazzi. It may be their choice to do those things, but it’s my choice to reject them. I want to look up to somebody who is real and who has accomplished real things.

 Real role models aren’t always famous. There are women who make a difference in thousands of people’s lives, but you’re never going to see their faces when you turn on the TV or open a magazine. Zainab Salbi started Women for Women International, an organization that helps refugees of war gain their lives back. While she’s been recognized, she’s definitely not a household name. We can’t always expect our role models to be right in front of our faces. But then again, sometimes they are. My own mother amazes me every single day. I have teachers and coaches in my life who do great things. Even my own peers, my friends, inspire me.

 It’s up to us to be critical, to put in a little effort. And this is something my generation is completely capable of. So many of us see that our current role models are pathetic, but until society changes, until we start valuing women for what they do over the way they look, the right role models will never be in front of our faces.

 My hope is that one day I will turn on the T.V. and see someone who is truly inspirational, dauntlessly representing feminist values. Until then, don’t lose faith in the next generation of teenage feminists. Look at the football games. Look at the dances. Even look at the mall, if you dare.

 We’ll be there.



Princesses out of control??

You know, we never bought in to that princess thing.   They just seems so fluffy and helpless and all about looks and sort of a prissy attitude.  However, we tried to keep an open mind - everyone is into different stuff. but to be honest, we had no idea it was getting this intense - with all the products and marketing - take a look at this blog from the Wall Street Journal -

Were you into princess stuff when you were little?  Are you still a princess or have you evolved in to a strong, out-spoken person? How about your friends and relatives - what have you observed?

How does treating a little girl like a princess tie in with the whole self-esteem movement?  Did your parents and teachers praise you for every little thing you did?  Did you feel like you deserved it?